Interrogation
by Fictionnaire
Summary: Chapter two: Tony interrogates Supernatural's Dean Winchester
1. Chapter 1

_**INTERROGATION**_

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_**SPOILER ALERT: Silent Night Deadly Night 1 & 2... Would help if you've seen it. LOL.**_

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_**A/N: Ok, I'm just in one of those weird moods. I wanted to see Gibbs or the rest interrogate certain people and characters... This is silliness to the max.**_

_**CHAPTER 1: Ricky**_

_**Name: Richard Caldwell**_

_**Aliases: Ricky**_

_**JOBS HELD: Dishwasher, hauling trash. College Student**_

_**Accused of: Killing Spree.**_

Gibbs sat down at the desk in front of the young man. He looked down at the file in front of him. It was a large file filled with a horrific childhood. Both parents were murdered. Richard and his brother was brought up in an orphanage run by nuns. The young man's older brother was gunned down in front of him. That was when he ended up working dead end jobs that ended up nowhere.

"Richard Caldwell," Gibbs said coldly. He looked over the list of victims. Normally, a case like this, Caldwell would have slipped into the FBI. But one of the victims, the kid who was electrocuted until his eyeballs popped was the son of a Marine. That Marine had ties with the Director so here he was interrogating Richard Caldwell.

"Actually... I prefer Ricky," Ricky waggled his eyebrows and animatedly moved his head a little each time spoke.

"Alright... Ricky," Gibbs responded. It seemed the young man was trying to intimidate him with overzealous eyebrow movement. "Tuesday, June sixteenth... What does that date mean to you?" Gibbs decided to go straight to the point.

"Garbage Day!" Ricky laughed.

Gibbs took a long drink from his coffee cup. "What caused you to start going out and just kill people?" Gibbs asked. They had to get to the point.

"Well for starters... The man who came out and interrupted me after I shot the cop had a can of alcohol. It was before four o'clock," Ricky answered with a very slight grin. "Drinking alcohol anytime is naughty. Drinking before then is very, very naughty. So the man had to be punished. Punishment is absolute," Ricky moved his eyebrows again. "That's what Mother Superior always says," he added.

"The guy taking out his trash," Gibbs prodded.

"He didn't separate the recyclables... Put plastic in a different container. That's what we've always been taught... Recycle!" Ricky answered. "He didn't recycle, he was naughty so he had to be punished," he told him.

"And the Police Officer?" Gibbs asked. This was getting somewhere at least.

"The Officer was a disgrace to law enforcement. He couldn't even wear the hat right. The guy was a moron who couldn't do his job," Ricky's voice remained a calm tone. "So..."

"So, he had to be punished?" Gibbs asked.

"Yes... Punished," Ricky waggled his eyebrows.

"So you don't deny shooting these people?" Gibbs asked. "Give me answers! I want to know why!" Gibbs tried to unnerve the younger man. He wanted all the answers he could possibly get. "What started you off?" Gibbs asked.

"It all started with Mother's superior's treatment of my brother Billy. He was always getting punished. You see... Billy was old enough to know what happened. Oh he learned what happens when Santa Clause comes to town," Ricky said. "Santa Clause kills... My older brother set out to punish the naughty... Naughty deserve to be punished," he stood up and looked into Gibbs' eyes. "Of course the police stopped him, they shot him before he could finish his work," Ricky waggled his eyebrows again.

"Sit down!" Gibbs smacked the table. The waggling eyebrows was just getting irritating. "So what? That was about ten years ago right?" Gibbs looked through the extensive notes. "So why wait so long?" Gibbs demanded to know.

"Things were going fine... After the orphanage closed down I was adopted to a nice family. One who didn't believe in Christmas," Ricky told him. "But then... I learned that they made a movie about a man dressed up as Santa Clause and going on a killing spree. They made a movie about my older brother," Ricky said.

"And that angered you enough to kill?" Gibbs asked. He had heard the BS that movies can incite violence.

"Have you seen Silent Night Deadly Night Agent Gibbs?" Ricky asked. His eyebrows began going out of control. "It was really, really bad. By rights the writers and producers should be punished for making such an atrocity," Ricky stood up again and his chair fell back.

"If you are trying to go for the insanity defense... Nobody in the world is going to believe you're insane," Gibbs said as he closed the file. "You're going to be in prison for the rest of your life," he warned. He was sick of people looking for easy ways out of their crimes. It never sat right with him.

"Oh, I'm not insane... I know that. Everything I've done has been perfectly logical," Ricky responded. He waggled his eyebrows once again. A Gibbs glare stopped the waggling eyebrows. Every time they looked like they were about to move... Gibbs stared them down.

_**INTERVIEW ENDED 1500 Zulu Time**_

_**Suspect In Custody**_

"I thought people liked to talk with their hands," Tony said while looking at Ziva. "I wonder if his eyebrows get shaved off if he'd able to talk," he wondered out loud.

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A/N: I saw Silent Night Deadly Night 1 & 2 on youtube and I thought of what would happen if Ricky (eyebrow waggler) was interrogated by Gibbs (glarer) I know it's ridiculous. But hoped you found it kind of funny. Which movie actor/Tv actor/celebrity would you like to see interrogated and by who? Again, hope people saw the humor side.


	2. Chapter 2

_**INTERROGATION 2**_

_**Suspect Name: Dean Winchester**_

_**Aliases: Dude, Bitch, Agent Scully.**_

_**Crime: Carrying weapons without a license, discharging firearms in a public place, damage to private property, Arson, (PTO) Trespassing, Impersonating federal agents, impersonating priests, impersonating building inspectors.**_

_**Current Position: restaurant critic (though not verified) **_

Tony walked around the room. The man sitting before him looked familiar. He wore a green jacket and blue jeans. Had he met him somewhere before? "What is your name?" Tony asked.

The man licked his lips before answering. "It's right there in the file dude," Dean answered.

Tony rubbed his eyes. This was going to be one of those interviews. Why had Gibbs got him to interrogate this smart ass? "Dean Winchester?" Tony asked as he finally sat down.

Dean arched his eyebrows. "Yes... Well done," He licked his lips. He found it amusing to be interrogated by NCIS, he thought it'd be the FBI and not some agency that wasn't even on the radar. He couldn't figure out why he was here.

"It's bugging me... Have we met before? Because you have one of those faces that look familiar," Tony said.

"I don't think so," Dean smirked. It was obvious he was going to use his charms to get out of this trouble.

Tony looked over the files. "My, you really have gotten yourself into a lot of trouble. The charges here are serious Dean Winchester," Tony said. It was true that Dean was probably in more trouble than he realized. "I want to know what you think about that," Tony said triumphantly. He had the upper-hand. Dean looked clearly guilty.

"Dude," Dean leaned back into the chair and shrugged before licking his lips. "I was just doing my job," he rapped his fingers on the desk.

"And pray tell... What is your job?" Tony emphasized the word job.

"We hunt things... We hunt things that would make other people run for the hills. We hunt things that people don't want to acknowledge that they exist," Dean licked his lips.

"Are you thirsty?" Tony asked.

"No... Why do you ask?" Dean asked him.

"You keep licking your lips every few seconds," Tony said.

"I do not," Dean responded.

"Do to," Tony argued.

"Do not," Dean licked his lips.

"Ah-ha! You just did," Tony pointed at him and shouted.

"Did what?" Dean asked innocently with a shrug of the shoulders.

"You licked your lips!" Tony exclaimed but then tried to get back to the real reason they were here. Though he did imagine taking a knife and cutting his tongue out. "So what were you doing at 13 Winchester Avenue in Falls Church Virginia?" Tony asked.

"Hunting," Dean said.

"There's nothing to hunt there," Tony responded. They couldn't hunt in Falls Church.

"There is if you're hunting ghosts... You know there's a few demons in Falls Church... You actually know there's an OCD in Falls Church?" Dean asked with a smirk.

"Yes I do actually... I know her," Tony said. He didn't see how the two could be connected. It was hard trying to the link.

"You know her?" Dean asked with a surprised look. "I'm surprised you're still alive," He stated and waited for a response.

"She's uptight but I doubt she'd do anything drastic," Tony shrugged his shoulders and laughed. "She maybe OCD but she's harmless," Tony responded.

Dean smirked at him and raised his eyebrows. It was surprising the man in front of him ran into an Obsessed with Castration Demon and was still in mint condition. "I'm impressed," he added. It was very impressive to see that he thought nothing of it.

"So what do you hunt?" Tony asked to keep the conversation back to normal.

"Demons, Ghosts, imps, monsters in the closet, monsters outside, dopplegangers... Vampires, werewolves, Ladies in the lake, phantom hitchhikers," Dean continued on after taking a breath.

"So you hunt BS?" Tony was confused by this.

"BS? I doubt that," Dean said. "Our Dad taught us about Demons, ghosts, imps, monsters in the closet E T C. You know that kids are afraid of what lies under the bed or the monster in the closet? Well we know why they should be... We know what's out there," he added.

"What's out there?" Tony asked.

"Demons, Ghosts, imps, monsters in the closet, monsters outside, dopplegangers... Vampires, werewolves, ladies in the lake, phantom hitchhikers," he said as if he thought Tony was slow. "What we do, we do it for protection... Because Dude, without us, the world would go to hell," Dean said proudly.

"You've already said that," Tony responded. "And for God's sake will you stop licking your lis?!" The small habit was getting on his nerves. "I'd like to see you explain why you thought it would be a good idea to shoot up the house and blame it on some non existant thing living in the attic," Tony said. "What? Did you really think that we'd fall for such a bad excuse?"

"It's the truth," Dean responded with another smirk.

Tony felt like smacking the smirk right off his face. "Then what happened to the other assailant?" Tony demanded to know. "If it's the truth where's the body?"

"It disappeared. Do you know what happens when you shoot a spirit full of rock salt? It dissipates," Dean made explosion motions with his hands. "No body, no proof," Dean responded. It seemed so natural to him.

"Convenient," Tony said without looking up. "Are you trying to tell me that was a vampire?" He laughed.

"That's stupid!" Dean snapped. "If it was a vampire there'd be ash and we would have had stakes... Did we have stakes? No. So therefore there were no vampires," Dean said matter-of-factly. He thought that people sounded so stupid when it came to paranormal stuff.

"So you're not going to defend your actions?" Tony asked as he closed the file. It was an open and shut case. Dean Winchester was clearly guilty of the charges that were on the paper.

"Why should I have to defend myself?" Dean asked. "I did nothing wrong Bitch," he said angrily.

"You insulted me," Tony said.

"You're a whiny little bitch," Dean retorted quickly.

"Hey," Tony responded. Things were heating up. "So you don't deny that you killed Joseph there and impersonated a federal agent while carrying an unlicenced firearm?" Tony asked. "Step outside," he said as he waited for Sam Winchester to be escorted into interrogation. "You are Sam Winchester are you not?" Tony asked and looked up.

Sam let his huge dimple-full smile do the talking for him.

"I see you're innocent. You're free to go," Tony told him.

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Dean Winchester: Remanded into custody until court date

Sam Winchester: Released


End file.
